


the annihilation of the worlds second shittiest species

by parmoral



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alien Invasion, Alternate Universe - Alternian Invasion, Canon-Typical Violence, M/M, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Alternating, POV Second Person
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-03
Updated: 2020-06-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:01:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24516568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parmoral/pseuds/parmoral
Summary: Post the bombing from the Alternian fleet that ended a good 40% of the human population, the Beta kids lead the rebellion against Her Imperious Condescension's fishy tyranny. Which would be easier if they weren't also guardians of the Alpha kids. Karkat Vantas not existing would help too.
Relationships: Dave Strider/Karkat Vantas
Comments: 12
Kudos: 15





	1. self-proclaimed fortune teller vs. dreams of an avid sleeper

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first fic. i have drafts for 3 chapters and ideas for all of the rest. this will (hopefully) be a long one.

Typically, on a day like this, you’d be chilling with your bro watching My Little Pony reruns as you lounge on the couch with your gamer laptop to rehash a script with your producer for the millionth time. At least, that’s what you would typically do approximately 5 years ago. Right now you’re in a militarized bunker with three other douchenozzles you’d like to consider your friends. You are silently listening to a pretty damn heated argument between Lalonde and English about some pointless unreliable intel you all received an hour or so ago. no way in hell are you voicing that opinion though, English gets scary when she thinks she knows what’s right.

JADE: you visions have not always been accurate lalonde

Oh shit, you are _so_ about to evacuate the premises. Vision talk between these two never ends well.

ROSE: Oh really, English? Is that really where you want to go with this? Your “visions” are precognitive dreams you glorify into truths. Mine, they tell of all fortuitous-

JADE: UGH!!!  
JADE: stop acting all high and mighty for once and LISTEN to me!!!

Oh sweet goddamn. Crocker speaks up for once in her life, and you refuse to acknowledge how grateful you are. Broads, man.

JUNE: ladies, ladies, please, can’t we come to like. a compromise or something. i think you guys are really blowing this out of the water!

Silence. Lalonde opens her mouth to speak, but English beats her to it.

JADE: you all really want to risk lives for this? cause you think im fucking mad? do you all not care about civilians anymore? are their lives not worth the hassle?

ROSE: The “hassle” is endangering thousands more if we’re to believe you, English.

Lalonde turns to you, scowl etched on her face. Oh god, oh fuck.

ROSE: Strider. Say something. Stop being an indifferent prick and contribute, please.

Uggghhhhhhh.

DAVE: i wont lie im hesitant as hell to agree with you english  
DAVE: its not that i dont believe you i just think its too big of a risk to send a squad out to investigate considering that theres probably a hell of a lot more people down here to worry about than up there yknow

JUNE: wellllllll…

You bet Crocker's going to spout some stupid batshit fix-all idea right about now, so you brace yourself.

JUNE: strider, how about you go scout it out yourself?

Ok, you weren't braced enough. What the fuck?

DAVE: what the fuck  
JADE: yeah i agree with the “what the fuck” sentiment  
ROSE: Thirded. Crocker, what’s your deal?

You're glad everyone's in fucking agreement here. Crocker is technically the "leader," but she also believes in the beautiful force of nature that is democracy.

JUNE: da- strider, oops, is the best we have at eliminating them. english, you said there should only be one, right? if we sent him and he does his stupid ninja bullshit i think it’ll work out just fine!  


Usually, you preach about the sheer quality of your “stupid ninja bullshit.” Now is not one of those times.

JADE: hm  


Jade taps at her chin, eyebrows creased in thought, for a good two minutes. 

JADE: strider i think shes right on this one. would be willing to do this? id offer to go with you but my weapon of choice isnt the most sneaky :(  


Lalonde is uncharacteristically silent. Weird. They’re all looking at you expectantly.

DAVE: fine whatever just tell the lil man that im gonna be out for a bit  


JUNE: i’ll be sure to let him know that bro's gone out for milk and a pack of cigs, dude.  


It’s not funny and you try not to think about it, but you chuckle compulsively anyway. Don’t wanna make shit awkward. English thanks you and proceeds to take her leave with Crocker. Standing in the room with only Lalonde left, she fixes you with a distant stare. You guess a conversation is a thing that’s about to happen, but you’re proven wrong when she breaks eye contact and swiftly exits. You aren’t sure what the fuck is going on with her but it’s not like she’d tell you if you asked, so you won’t bother. You exit too, so you can get all geared up and put this shitshow of a mission into motion, you fucking guess.  
It's, allegedly, time to kill a troll.


	2. pathetic people should die in pathetic ways

You’re roasting some nutbeasts on a stick with one hand as you rapidfire type on your palmhusk with the other. The large gash in your left bicep makes this a little challenging, but you manage. You aren't really experiencing the pain as much as you probably should be, but you attribute to how still going off of adrenaline. Adrenaline, and fear. Lots of goddamn fear. You consider yourself to be good buddies with fear. Fear and you go _way_ back. Fear fucking coddled you during your pupation and fear held your frond as you huddled in the small alcove your lusus carved below your hive for you to hide from any passerby culling drones. Ever since you landed on this shit planet, not even a fucking wipe ago, fear hasn’t been so buddy-buddy with you anymore. It’s ripped into your thorax and tightened its frond on your still-beating pusher in a vice grip. You think you’ll die of blood pusher cease-function (or blood loss) before any humans, or trolls, can put you out of your misery.

Your good friend has been frantically texting you since the moment you evacuated, and you’d appreciate the concern at any other time, but right now you kind of just want to curl up in a ball and let the drones and the humans race to call dibs on taking your shitty life.

GA: Karkat Have You Moved Positions At All Are You Still At The Human Scuttlebuggy Replenishment Station  
GA: Karkat  
GA: Karkat Are You There  
GA: Gog Fucking Damnit Vantas Answer Me  
CG: SORRY, I’M HERE. JUST FREAKING THE FUCK OUT AND ALL. NO OFFENSE BUT YOUR FREAKING THE FUCK OUT IS SENDING ME INTO HYPER FREAK THE FUCK OUT MODE. KIND OF DETRIMENTAL TO MY HEALTH, HERE.  
CG: THEN AGAIN I WON’T BE ALIVE MUCH LONGER TO BE CONCERNED ABOUT THE LONG-TERM EFFECTS OF A PANIC ATTACK THE SIZE OF THE GREEN FUCKING MOON!  
GA: You Arent About To Die  
GA: I Wont Allow It

Now would be a good time to joke about Kanaya's tendency to wax pale for you, but you aren't exactly in the mood.

GA: Ive Contacted Sollux And Hes Trying To Disarm The Fleet Thats Following You Right Now  
GA: Ampora Has Alerted The Rest  
GA: Serket And Terezi Have Begun Plotting Something And Im Not Entirely Sure What It Is But Im Positive That Its With Our Interests In Mind For Once  
GA: As For Me I Plan On Joining You  
CG: KANAYA. *WHAT* **THE** ***FUCK*** DO YOU MEAN THAT YOU’RE “JOINING” ME, EXACTLY?  
CG: CANCEL THIS INANE RESCUE MISSION FOR BOTH OF OUR AND EVERYONE ELSE'S SAKES  
CG: I DON’T NEED HELP. THEY’RE AFTER ME FOR A GOOD FUCKING REASON, MARYAM. IN FACT, MY WHOLE FUCKING LIFE HAS BEEN LEADING UP TO THIS MOMENT!  
CG: I HOPE IT’S AS ANTICLIMACTIC AND UNMEMORABLE AS IT IS IN ALL OF MY YOUTHFUL FANTASIES.  
CG: I’M GOING NOW. DON’T COME AFTER ME, KANAYA  
CG: PLEASE.

You turn off your husk and look into the makeshift fire you made from a couple chairs, some human scuttlebuggy fuel, and the matches in the matchbox you looted from a human corpse. You ate all of your roasted nutbeasts and you don’t know what to do anymore. You suppose you could just wait here, or you could walk right into that human settlement you spotted and get riddled with lead. Your instinctual hindbrain tells you not to, tells you to move, to run, to hide, to do _something_. so you get up, not bothering to put out the fire, and walk out in the night. You don’t know where you’re going, and frankly, you don’t care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> from here on out chapters should be longer than these first two.


End file.
